No way Am I doing that...

No way I'm getting married. Few months ago, I almost fell into that trap of marriage. Thought is fun to get married, BUT HELL NO:

I'm not handling 1.unruly children, 2.my horny man, 3.bossy in laws, 4.ageing parents.

How do I wish that cohabitation is cool here...
I cant handle juggle roll and please others in the name of marriage.

Can I just be in love, just be in love with my job, holidays planning and executing it, nice cosy home, make love with my man & be free

Just a mini car driving us wild not the children.

A small garden where we plan and appreciate our hardwork and let the flowers/plants to reproduce but not us.

Mummy I know you're saving $$ but Mommy pls give me that cash. I'd rather study.

Traditional, conventional, typical marriage is indeed not for me...
why should i pay thousands of dollars to please others with a hearty meal. Ok yes their blessing is there but look, its all tit for tat. Afterall people who attend weddings might just place their 'hong bao' & go back with a souvenier and filled tummy, some with intoxicated liver. Oooh after tat, wat we spend is hardly what we get back.

I don't understand the joy in getting married. Again, Mommy pass me the $$$, I'd rather study and learn about life & get ahead far and better as what the psychic told me.

You know that I cant even keep my room clean, how to keep a home clean. You did a very good job, but you literally slogged through it. I don't want to suffer. I've disastrous mood swings and I'm nowadays running away from problems than facing em.

This year taught me how to handle emotions, stress & many many others, yet I feel its not enough.
& No way I'm gonna struggle even more by getting married...

What I'm feeling...right now

Two weeks away it feels like the whole world should've changed

But I'm home nowAnd things still look the same

I think I'll leave it till tomorrow to unpack

Try to forget for one more night

That I'm back in my flat on the road

Where the cars never stop going through the night

To a life where I can't watch sunset

I don't have timeI don't have time

[Chorus:]I've still got sand in my shoes

And I can't shake the thought of youI should get on, forget you

But why would I want toI know we said goodbye

Anything else would've been confused but I wanna see you again

Tomorrow's back to work and down to sanity

Should run a bath and then clear up the mess I made before I left here

Try to remind myself that I was happy here

Before I knew that I could get on the plane and fly away

From the road where the cars never stop going through the night

To a life where I can watch sunset and take my time,Take all our time

[Chorus]I wanna see you again

Two weeks away, all it takes to change and turn me around I've fallen

I walked away and never said that I wanted to see you again

[Chorus x2]I wanna see you againI wanna see you again

Begone jane, Become Lady Susan

Dear Jane A,

I, Lady Susan, my dreams are coming true.
wishes that I penned in my lil notebook lettered to God is getting materialised.
All in a surprise from someone I didn't expect to be.

Becoming jane or becoming you is becoming serious.
As I aspire to be the wonder woman, but would my average joe succumb to support me?
This time, Jane, decided to allow someone serious to be involved in my life.

becoming jane or becoming you means getting life moving forward, yet letting off the hard hold but swaying according to the wind direction.
You, Jane, finally decided to marry the "Rich" Noble Man & be humble good wife. How tough is that?
Lest it seems that your ambitions might be distorted or comes along in a harder rough road.

Jane, I feel that I can still have that "Austen legend" in me as long my emotions don't get the better of me.

It should be the perserverence & manipulation convincing power that gets me going.

With love,
Becoming of Lady Susan V. from Jane A.
NTY

a baby facing the harsh world

It's hard to remember how it felt before
Now I found the love of my life
Passes things, get more comfortable
Everything is going right
And after all the obstacles
It's good to see you now with someone else
And it's such a miracle that you and me are still good friends

After all that we've been throughI know we're cool
I know we're coolWe used to think it was impossible
Now you call me by my new last name
Memories seem like so long ago
Time always kills the pain
Remember Harbor Boulevard
The dreaming days where the mess was made
Look how all the kids have grown, oh
We have changed but we're still the same
After all that we've been through
I know we're coolI know we're cool
Yeah, I know we're cool
And I'll be happy for you
If you can be happy for me
Circles and triangles
And now we're hanging out with your new girlfriend
So far from where we've been


Will still love you, best when you're far away and happy...
8 years...still counting till its all gone...
Not easy as you're always,
Always in my mind.

Love You Always...

If I were A Man, I'd die for her...........

pack up pack up

Look back on all the things you said.

They all keep running through my head.

I just wish you would come to your senses, but do you know what love is?

I didn't know love until I knew you,but you just had to break my heart in two.

I wish you would come fix it like you did before, instead of me sitting here crying on the floor.

I try not to think about it,but when I have nothing to do,all that's in my head are memories of you.

I keep wanting and hoping that you'll come back to me, and never again will you leave.

But today I feel you rather pack up and leave.

This will be last post dedicated to you.

The more intensive the feeling ...the more intensive my hatred towards you.

At the end of the day, you just still somekinda A**H*** I've ever come across...

Whoops, cant help but this is the truth...

note to Z Cutie: hey hey, I've come to learn his ugly side... anyway thanks for expressing ya concerns of us...

I'll just wait...

you know wat.

Are you there forever?

You are one big confusing man...
When I ignored you before, you'll came begging for my attention every night-
To meet you at a corner for some carcinogen sticks.

My eyes were stuck to the diluted white fumes and you watched through my eyes fishing for signals of attachment.
Praying that I'll still have the same old crush towards you.
But I crushed your hopes when I voiced out my dates and beaus.

You stroked my skin, without any reciprocation on my side
And would shamelessly tell that me you are still attracted to me more than any other women.
I most probably ignored your words & arrogantly told you that my Mars is in Scorpio and probably its natives are highly attractive among opposite sex.
You questioned it to be a Curse or Boon?

Love or seduction?

You diligently put up with my stuck-up attitude and carry on caressing me.
If I were to cry a lil pain you’d instantly massage me.

But now…. When I run back to you the same way as you did, you are so…
Karmic enough, I’m carrying your curse.

Please say that you’re still the same…
I can’t accept you to be indifferent….
Look into me and say Please Leave Me…
I will discard the years from us.




Great lovers never got Married

Still can't accept her demise...

Being in this insurance line for about 1 - 2 years- mentioning death, illnesses, disability is so common that my sales presentation would sound odd if I not at all pronounce these.
Somewhere in Feb this year, a hard news came knocking on my world. A test to my profession that was just starting...

I might soon have to witness a painful passing away of my aunt. She has two young boys. Her illness is soon to be terminal. Her illiterate husband is clueless. I've something to do with her existing insurances as always. Thank God, financially she was saved.

When my mom told me this news, I couldn't fight back my tears in sleep. Her 2 young boys', aged 10&12 respectively, whose future was a big question mark.

Going back to work next day was like revisiting hell. I really couldn't focus. To worsen, we'd a training to let us know of an addition to the list of critical illness. Even there cancer has place as the no.1 devil.

To assure things would be fine, I went to visit her in the hospital. The sight of her tubed with fluid food and respiratory system, made me wished harder that it wasn't her. Watching her sound asleep while tears drew its trail on my cheek. Crying seemed as an act of cowardice &/or emotional, thus I'll quickly revert to my normal strong self. So I'll quickly make a move before her or my relatives would appear out of nowhere.

She was angry with us it seemed. She didn't wanted to see her hubby's (mom's bro) family. Nonetheless, I knew that she had nothing of hatred towards me. I still have lots of gifts from her. Like the T-Shirts she bought for me and handed down some as they were too small to fit her.

Yearly Deepavalis I'll taste her signature Basmati Rice Briyani. Sundays will be spent at her home savouring Peranakan & Malay style dishes. Sometimes she'll take orders and they'll be prepared without any hassle. All she would do is give me a ring & I'll be at her doorsteps within minutes. Her house is just a block away from mine.

I really miss her. Till now, I'm still unconciously telling ppl that I'm going to Athai's house, never to uncle or Pravin hse

We had many playful, light hearted conversations on what kind of man I should marry- Why I shouldn't marry late? How much she would want to see me married like others? Complaining on her sons and yet praising their school performances and many other personal conversations which she might not have shared with her family.

If there's a month to forget it'll be October 2008.
During then I could only recall the final toll of pain hitting her life. For that I pray that she'll never have a rebirth as human soul but to just rest in Peace.

The only thing I've always wished for during her funeral prayers is that "Give me the support and strength to help bring up your boys as you've always wished for"

Still can't believe you ain't here anymore...

Ideal Lovemaking is by grunting?

Weird news...

'LATEST: MAROON 5 frontman ADAM LEVINE has denied reports he claimed he ditched tennis ace MARIA SHARAPOVA because she was a "terrible lover" who refused to moan or move during sex. The pair dated briefly in 2005, after meeting at the Russian Wimbledon champion's 18th birthday party - but their romance soon fell cold. Levine was quoted in Russian magazine Exile as saying, "She wouldn't make any noise during sex... She just lay there like a dead frog. She even got angry if I started to moan, said it 'ruined her concentration'." However, Levine's spokesperson has dismissed the quotes as being "absolutely not true". '

http://www.contactmusic.com/news.nsf/article/levine%20denies%20criticising%20sharapovas%20lovemaking%20style_1041149

Me to Levine- She ain't any passionate with you boy... Too BaD...

Maria Fans might agree with me that her excessive grunting should just stay on court to distract her opponents. Or At least let him not get turned off hearing her aggressions...

Or Perhaps thats the reason why Levine dated her...

Maybe the lil demon in me wonders if noises do turn guys on? (if you wish to respond to this qns pls do so anonymously)

Btw... Where are all my readers?

Are you all busy or find it tad too much to digest the contents here?

My new tagboard awaiting you ppl...

bleah bleeah...

Wat the F...
Move on...
Stop complaining...

Save me

Past few days my face just can't show its true smile...

School is really killing. Progression is a must. Doing it so with a degree might accentuate my standing in career. But Nowadays I just cant show anymore enthusiasm towards school. Classes are to be held thrice a week. And in those days I'll have work roadshow. Thanks to the sickening economical crisis, roadshows are held day in day out.

headbreakin dilemma. I REALLY DON"T KNOW WHAT TO DO

If I were to go for roadshows, I've to skip school and vice versa.
Plus these roadshows aren't lucrative as before. People feel cash is king and hardly bother our products anymore. So money and figures are harder to come by than before...Since time is bad, partners expect us to help and stay focused...

Sales appointments crop up at its own time and wish. Definitly cant miss it as it means $$$.
Still aiming for the Summit Club.

School is only 9 modules left. I've to cram it so that I'm done with a basic degree at least.
The amusing part is in those 3 lessons per week share a stark contrast.
Lesson 1-Biz Communication (commerce subj)
Lesson 2-Statistics Maths(Maths)
Lesson 3-Typography(Arts)

with all 3 assignments each week.

Roadshows that start at 11 till 10pm... that are almost daily for us
I'm dying...WTF--NEver been so excuses...

Coming soon in new year---
I might just quit my job or school or country...

Feeling FCUKinG Irritated...

REALLLLLLYYYYYYYYYYY
FFFRRRRREAAAAKKKKKKKKKKKIIIINNNNGGGGGGGGGGGG
IRRRRRRRRRRRIIIIIIIIITTTTTTTEEEEEDDDD.................................

$$Ka Ching$$

Shania Twain playing Devil's Advocate probably to the banks...

We live in a greedy little world-- That teaches every little boy and girl

To earn as much as they can possibly-- Then turn around and Spend it foolishly. Weve created us a credit card mess

We spend the money we dont possess.Our religion is to go and blow it all

So its shoppin every sunday at the mall

All we ever want is more A lot more than we had before

So take me to the nearest store [chorus:]




Can you hear it ring It makes you wanna sing
Its such a beautiful thing--ka-ching! Lots of diamond rings
The happiness it brings Youll live like a king
With lots of money and things

When youre broke go and get a loan Take out another mortgage on your home
Consolidate so you can afford To go and spend some more when
You get bored

Lets swing Dig deeper in your pocket
Oh, yeah, ha Come on I know youve got it
Dig deeper in your wallet Oh

Hypnotized.....

In this intoxicated heart * This desire to fly * Where has this come from?* this confidence *
Oh my beloved *

These winds * Ties its knots, in fabrication * Remain in play, in here *
These droplets of rain, * Involved in this conspiracy* The whole universe *
All that constitutes in here, * The questions asked * Oh my beloved *

In conversation, my eyes As this * world pronounces * Its judgment, upon me *
On language of heart, * This love desires, and asks * Where is this storm? *
Carry me on these avenues * New this concept is, * The first promise Of union amongst us *
Carry on * I walking * In my toes, the fireAppears to me, *
Spent all my life in strangers * Belong I not here, take me *
To your deserts and mountains * This ignorant world In presence, *
the enemy * Oh my beloved! *

Nicer dance steps from 7:34 onwards

rather sell puffs if it goes on.

I was doing roadshow in some neighbourhood malls. Seems like if anyone sees a bank name, they do just see us as invicible.

Recently, we just cant bother selling cards that is low or rather no revenue to some of us.

However quite a distance from my booth, there is Old Chang Kee. Looking at the crowd there, wish I was selling puffs and make some old folks worry less of their retirement funds by securing them a job than to face questions like "What is happening to my money??"

Best still, in the past few days and in many other roadshows before we would patronise their shops for 3 meals a day... Generosity, Generosity from broke(n) souls

As always the grass on the other side is greener... so are the smiles and the cashbox

To dear NtY

Hi Nithya,

How have you been? Bad I suppose? Its been quite sometime I've seen you planning for your sales targets. Lately you have not been going to work with interest. Your presentation file has lost its intriguing image. Looks like your fund fact sheets are yet to be updated.
Don't tell me the economic crisis is putting an effect for you. Well hey aren't you the girl who disses off negativism about the market.

So what happened to your warm market networks? Do people still see you as passionate and agressive? I hope they do.

Oh look, I see some flabs of skin around your tummy. Don't tell me your abs are united? Thats why you shouldn't quit soccer. It keeps you fit and crazily youthful looking. Nonetheless, you look much matured with added weight...

I heard talks of marriage going on. Who, Vicky Rao??? Looks like you'll never learn your lesson. Move on dear. He ain't the one for you anymore. You know his style and approach in life, don't you. C'mon Vicky Rao can't satisfy you la. Move on ok...

Do update me of what's bothering you ok... Its time you to speak out and let yourself loose...

Love your (sub) conscience...

Heart Rages in Passion

There is one too many reasons why I fear passion in relationship.

True that when there is passion; Expectation follows or perhaps demanded.
And when that happens, how well I had fail to keep my thoughts and actions clear to the other party. Causing grievances to each other. Deep cuts in heart and wounds in mind.

This is where I rather make peace within all. Why fight and get emotional when the heart seeks happiness? Can't we just be in Peace.

Cant imagine how 2 (of us) people who'd went through against all odds now end up totally disgusted...
I've been cut again-2 years later...
-----------------------

Reminding the movie Prime...

If only i wasn't toying recklessly back then...

Move forward

To whom it may concern,

I tend not to hold too much grudges and just learn to move on.
Even if you hate me for such character, probably I'll still come back to you as friends. Much because due to the fact that tomorrow is not confirmed and not guranteed. Thus why hold grudges and hatred for too long.

It took me too long to change from that pessismistic me. Its now hard to be such again. I need to move on from people who keep ranting of their difficulties with others. When I provided you help and ideas to move forward, you seem to be reiterating on it again and again. Whats the point? Isn't it time to move away and be less available. You can but you couldn't and I didn't see it.

If you are one who share the same passion as I do, probably you will not bother much about things that has no hope. Not many I know do...

Perhaps if I were to interfere and hold you back you'll find me harsh. Thus I choose to ignore such calls.
Since young I have seen women losing much in the name of love and sympathy. I wonder if I want to end up in such area. I choose not to, thus I chidded you and many others away.

Lately there have been lotsa commotions. Worsening economic conditions has shown a toll in my earnings lately, apart from some unpromising clients who lapsed my cases. Previously a drought in roadshows made less revenue for me.

Old debts arise out of nowhere. Its time to settle as there is no such thing as free lunch.

School has started. Speak about timing and rest. I'm not aware of them anymore. Assignments will dread and not to mention-Exams.

Till the end of the year- I've in total 9 roadshows. No more weekends off. The irritating questions is will I be allowed to focus on Insurance products. That will be known in due time.

MY long time beau, whom I still keep faith, because we've been there for each other is showing signs of hopelessness(this word is cited from his mouth). No faith in future with us. So I've to move forward and not show any emotions towards it.

Lastly, in my family 2 young boys have lost their mother, my mom has lost her sister-in law and her brother has lost his partner. Too much emotions dwelling with them. But if I were to look into all the above mentioned matters emotionally, I'll drown. They need me much to help them. I will without seeking anything in return but just happines.

I've no choice but to ignore the sadness and move forward with solutions...

Read my astrology intepretations.

For now and always it has been my dearest solace. Full of positivism and light of hope.

-8 Libra/Scorpio
The combination of your Sun sign and your Moon sign denotes a nature that is independent of mind and action, thought and expression. You are both mentally quick and penetrating, with an absorbing curiosity. Thus, you are a ready student, precocious, and wanting to make rapid strides in the world. Your superb logic and analytical abilities are wrapped in a wave of emotionalism.

You have a detective approach to things. Sneaking up on a question, figuring out what it is you want to achieve, and pouncing on it with full force. This is not a vague and undecided Libra. There is spice in your nature, excess and extremes in your actions. You have a strong sense of justice, and you can fly off the handle when you feel you have been treated unfairly. On the surface you can seem docile and amiable, but underneath you'll fight at the drop of a hat.

You are a born idealist and rebel, a radical, always on the side of change, progress and novelty. You are an enthusiast in all matters, and have little time for people that pussy foot around and seem to lack conviction. Your interests are broad and sweeping...ideas, philosophies, the arts. So you're inclined more to the professions or the artistic, instead of a business career.

In times like this

Issues have been let loose. Feel like I'm struggling to get back to my form at work.
Current economic situation has been weakening the situ. In total 6 lapses from my insurance clients and still counting.

Meanwhile, Friends and family issues take a toll on me. Demanding and high expectation of friends are down too much to handle. At times I feel lighter without them, but that is never the case to be.

In times like this I miss my poly days so much. My motivated peers. We would always be moving forward with grades, medal achievements and thinking of the job we would hold in the future. I know that I have no right to compare. I need to still learn that angle.

Soccer was another avenue. Trainings, laughter and love mess kept me and others so much lighter. Yes money was lacking then, but not fun and love.

Now it has changed to a total different direction.

My Life Story...

The probability of my life story is akin to Jane Austen...

that is Becoming Jane...

Why slow...

Well many of my friends who had been with me since Poly days(2005) know that I'm slow in achieving one particular (mini) milestone in my life. MY driving licence. Yeah even my brothers brag that they have gotten theirs within 3 or what 5 months. Thats how slow I'm acquiring the 2 wheeler or 3 wheeler licence.

Well now with regrets I realise that I need a car so badly. Mind you, that owning one in the course of my job is not a liability but an investment tool. You have one, you ought to have lotsa lotsa business. You see people like my mobile bankers(working partners) seek comfort like you and me. I do sourly regret that I lost out a big time in gaining potential business. WHY??? AS I'm yet to get a freaking DAMN LICENCE.

So there I go, inpatiently started looking for an instructor. Ah-there is one from AceDriving Centre, Mr Michael Tan. As cool his name may sound,I'm relating to the former F1 ACE, that instructorr in on the extreme horror of contrast. Short, SLOW, Kiasi, KIASEE, sleepy, groggy and KIASI again...

As a learner we have to practice good braking habits, gear changing, negotiating speeds along different roads is one of the many acquired skills of handling your vehicle. So when Michael took me, he obviously knows that I've been taking my lessons on and off. So it is assumed that I know how to GOD DAMN drive. Probably all that he needs to do is ensure how smooth I apply my skills. But this man, little dirty man, wanting to milk money, he would ask me to drive for 40km/h. To drive on straight roads that is.

Imagine 40 Km/H- 4th gear is never needed. And another joke is he'll wear his shades, lie back and even doze off... MY $39 dollars !! All wasted by just driving a straight road. In fact maintaining a straight path is tougher than moving in a higher speed. Its like driving Miss Laizy around the sembawang road. And that Miss LAizy imposes authority while sleeping. e.g. when the signboards say 70KM/H, I'll still be driving at 38km/h. Guess what when I accelerate. Miss Daisy would wake up, assumes I didn't know he dozed off and say "Slow down, fast doesn't mean you are good. You have to correct your mistakes by driving slowly" Correct my mistakes? On a straight road? Where on earth is this man from?

So I changed to another instructor. Someone who hardly speaks good English but solid one...
Simple straight forward and is worth paying additional $3. And guess what he told me when I told him of my bad experience . "Oh Michael Tan ah, aiya ask the whole UBI, his car is the slowest car in Singapore." Hmm What a luck...

Market is worsening- only for the ignorant.

For many years, I've heard of recession, crisis, turmoils etc etc. All the $$ taboo words.

I would be totally ignorant or aloof on this matter. Probably I wouldn't know much. As well as I've not been bitten.

Now, I'm feeling the pinch. Emails flood with advice on why Prudential will not fall to similar fate of our Rival AIA. Customers losing trust with the European/American Companies are now steering their way to Local Insurers. Urgent meetings arise touching issues on how to handle their fears.

Gossips and rumours in the air have the words. That as many as hundreds of financial institutes will follow the similar situation of Merril Lynch or AIA.

Someone predicted once that Singapore will be so affected that some decades later, there would be paupers and homeless citizens. And before that to happen this current crisis would evolve as long as over the next 5 to 15 years. Don't be Surprised.

To tell the truth, I'd felt being in a RUT. Having customers who invested their monies, would they get back what they placed? Esp those who have parted their CPF savings for higher(potential) interests.

I'm tearing within. Today colleagues who are salaried and situated at back end, gleefully walked past me saying "Luckily I'm not in this(my) line"

To sum all up, Am I involved? I beg to differ. Lets wait and see. I now remember my Friendster shoutout I placed long ago. 'Millionaire by 32'. The journey is about to begin now. ITs theme shall be "Have greed when all is Fearing" -(courtesy of Warren Buffet and boss on monday)

Before they(colleagues) realise how it impacts them, its good luck to their ignorance...

Yeah feeling rebelious since yesterday...

Personal Daily Horoscope of Sunday, 14 September 2008
for Nty, born 19 October 1982

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A bit wild
Weak, transient effect: This morning the quality of time arouses an independent and rebellious spirit in you. You are inclined to do exactly the opposite of what someone suggests and to reject whatever others say simply because they said it. For the same reasons you are impatient with restraints, duties and responsibilities. There is a great need to be free and to do something very different, maybe even a little bit wild. You have a strong craving for excitement with this influence, and you may act in ways that you would never consider in a more sober mood. This could be either good or bad, of course, depending on how conservative you usually are and how unusual or outrageous the action. For some people this can be a very liberating influence. For others it is a bit too much.

For the past few days, Freedom and excitement has been ringing my mind...

Lets see what else is in store in for future seeking the above mentioned...

Becoming Jane, Becoming Real

Today was an empty Saturday as usual. This has been happening quite a while. Enjoying my weekends off. My mind was clearly recalling last Sunday in PD Trip. The heat, aggression, competition, blue blacks and many more. That will be exploited in full details the next time.

Today as I wished for a long time, I've finally caught BECOMING JANE. A classic based on the famous Jane Austen. The writer, creator and inspirant of Pride and Prejudice & also the movie Kandu Kondein Kandu Kondein.


Mr Tom Lefroy, an impudent, impertinent and a man with no reputation falls in love with the writer Jane who is poor and penniless. Both have no evident financial means to get united and start a family. So in the end they would be separated for a practical reason.

To them the reality is that, Marriage can never, to the purest of hearts and minds, occur between two people without affection. So they eloped. But the conclusion was contradicting. In the case of Jane, who was penniless and ready to let go off everything for him wakes up to a sad reality behind Tom and leaves him. For he was a highly depended man who had many mouths to feed. Therafter she stayed single till her short life ended.

In reality, Money isn't everything. But sadly Everything is Money.
It paths your life. Work for it till you never be devoid of it in life.

Solid movie..truly LOVED it...

Luckily I didn't catch it when I was on my flight back from London. Else I would be between two strange male passengers sniffing off with flooded eyes. Because the last scene really caught me.

As it is for Jane, Affection and Attraction too are my ultimate decider to marry. Not money. Yet again, the reality is...
Money is my biggest contradicting object of desire... Lest hope Love Shan't be...

Dazzle to Mezzle...

There are songs That are worth umpteen listens...
Here are some of my alltime selection...

PD Trip...

PD Trip is an highlight of the year for many.
A trip that is yearly for some of the few
A trip that may bring painful memory for that some of the fews
A trip that was planned to unite/foster new relations
A trip that has gotten some to be firmer about existing relations
A trip that brought me to be Rugged with No Reservations

Enough Said...

Well Lets look at the sight and sightings of the trip...
click me

Well here are some pics that aren't avail on the above link

Astrology

Yesterday I was chatting with Jeena. I wish I didn't open that book of astrology and offered her some help of mine.

From the year of 2005 to 2006, I was addicted to this subject. It was a calling. My deep desires to understand the human relations and our minds were fast and raging. I'll remember doing intensive reaserches, that see me through without food but just coffee and cigarrettes.

Drawing these 9 blocks, intepreting my natal charts, finding out why humans behave in such manner thrilled me than none other. Understanding each and every exaltations and detriments of planets. To the extent that I would go to temple not to pray to Vinayagar, Murugan or anyone else but to the 9 planets that are located at the corner of the temple.

My reason being simple. I didn't believe that powers are recieved by just praying. Therefore we don't get our energies by offering the favourite foods and particular colored silk towels to the 9 planets. Our bodies are in need of such energies. When we give offerings to such planets it is equivalent to welcoming their good effects(minusung their negative energies) into our lives, bodies and minds.

Well to cite a popular example, would be where many would offer black sesame seeds on Saturday to cool off Saneeswaran(Planet Saturn)- just to evade from his miseries.

Likewise I would do such but not to him. To the planet Venus. It would be offering of white towels and jasmine and saying her mantra. Now this is what I meant of praying-my style. True enough things did paid off. With its fair share of ups and downs. I been to places which I would only dreamt of. I saw the greek Goddess of Venus-Milo. Its not miracle but believing that overpowering ourselves with these planets.

One of my most highly read about planet would be the moon planet.
It depicts the most detailed story line of every individual. In my life I just wish that there is this one Moon that will never show up in my life. The taurus moon-Rohini nakshatra. It reeks the extremes in my life. An astrologer once told me that in my life Rohini would be my worse lover and enemy. For now I believe that my sagas with these natives of that nakshtra has ended.

Well I hope not all Rohinis would engrave such impacts. Good to know that our funky Jeena is not of such... HaHaHa...

Just a tip. I've learnt that Astrology should be a guideline. To understand ourselves better. But not to blindly imply their predictions as mentioned by some paid expert. In the Gita, it is once said that one who understands himself is equal to understanding the world itself.
Its all within ourselves.

Law of Attraction

I'm a victim of law of attraction.
My mind needs space to recover.

Well one of my uncle got into a forklift accident. His leg was trapped beneath a giant forked wheel. His left leg is now bandaged with gauzes and cloth that sizes up his foot up 2 notches.

He is my fave. So to speak I'm his fave and he's always so proud of me. But he's in the hospital. And I hate to go to hospitals. These are places of negative energy. My mind just get too restless and seeks some entertainment without any thought.

But ask me to go bowling, hang out late nights with the people, eat expensive coca steamboat...I will.

Cos my mind is full of need for recreation, entertainment, and lotsa lotsa fun.
And the PD trip is one that I've been fondly waiting for. Speak of Law of Attraction.

Guess what..
I'm getting ready reluctantly to visit him. But now hooked to Trisha's Akkam Pakkam song...

My dream has taken its form.

You are what you think.

You are what you eat.

Your thoughts are your reality.

Your character is based on your thought.

I have heard this so many times. In my life now it has been all in their materialising state.

I have an interesting colleague way back from Great Eastern. Someone who is admirable. Especially for the new comers who are searching their purpose in this line will find him such.

He is one of the high achievers. Year in year out MDRT. Lots of valuable knowledge in the insurance business. Partly due to his long term service in this line. His perseverence and persistency akin to those you read in motivational books. Sounds good and gawkable.

But unfortunately, he is not well liked. Relations seem hard to stick by with him. This is a common situation among high achievers and those who have ambitions that seem too superficial to many.

I Can't call it arrogance but narrow minded. Its admirable. To think of it I die hard to be in such shoes. But the fact is hard and cold. Thats what I'm going through right now. Sometimes that person could be myself. Its hard to juggle the best suited face and please all around us.

But thanks to one new found man who stands by my side with no reservations.
My vision is actualised. My thoughts are now outspoken. My dream has taken its form.

Love you dear...

Am I doing the right thing.

going for something that i know will never exist.
letting go of something that will never go away.

having a final go for a simple yet trivial reason.

not going too deep to know what it has deep within.
Being shallow on outside attraction and not the reality.

No I am not. But I'm used to it. Searching for the perfection and killing myself all within.

It seems I like it Hard

Football.
Insurance job.
'Parentless' family.
Confused gender friends.
Long distant relationships
Manual Cars.
Difficult branch.
Headquarter branch.
Midfielder post.
Week in Weekend out Roadshows.
Married and to be married men and women.

It seems l like it glorious.
Visiting Mona Lisa.
Climbed Arch -l'triumphe
Eiffel Tower.
Prizes and Luxuries.
Found back old long lost relation.
Centre of Attention.

What is this place worth to you?

There's a belief and song that we've gotten ourselves where we are today because we've pulled together, some of us in the middle rungs, others from the lower rungs.

Pressed, pushed, cajoled, peeved sometimes at what we've had to go through, never satisfied 100 per cent with the rewards, envious of those who have received more, and often ignorant of those below us who've needed much more.

This is who we are.

But look for a moment at where we stand; where we came from; and how we got to where we are.Could you or I have set the direction- turned swampland into industrial parks, schools and housing estates; a naval outpost into a leisure playground that's soon to host an integrated resort and spawn thousands of jobs; a port that rivals and and every other facility in the world; an airline that is well known in Moscow as it is in the Maluku Islands.

It takes some doing by people with fresh and brilliant minds; geeks and nerds who calculate traffic flow with such precision that a green wave that gets you from Orchard Road to Raffles City becomes an accepted and unappreciated right; someone so fastidious that street hawkers were re-sited to food centres years ago to save us from diarrhoea and dysentry.

We are affected daily by their handiwork, from the time we turn on the tap to brush our teeth with water that's the envy of the developed world and all of the developing world who live with brownouts and standpipes that is makes you near dead.

Yes, some get angry too: that tax demands are on time; that a nod and a wink and a fistful of dollars will not jump you adead of the queue for an HDB flat; that officials can be so punctiliousin the way they carry out their functions.

We have a system that works- some will argue too efficiently and sometimes lacking in warmth and compassion. But it is the envy of many.

Who are the people behind his place we live in? One that's provided a sense of belonging; that you often love to hate and even hate to love on those ocassions when things don't go your way.

It's your Government, your Prime Minister and his Cabinet; it's your civil servants, who sometimes appear to think as much how much more they can tax, as they do about how they can give you a neighbourhood green lung to chill.

We operate in a society that is often unaware of the faceless civil servants who have helped make this place more livable; or which ignores the difficulties of the politician selling a tough decision which, at the end of the day, has kept this country alfoat despite regional economic contagion, bird flu and the impact of loving in a sometimes a prickly neighbourhood.

How much is that worth to you?

How much is it worth to be able to live in the relative comfort of our own home, to enjoy the security of your environment, to worship freely in your temple? How much do you value the strength of your dollar, the recognition the Singapoer brand names has, the quality of your Government?

Paying and obeying to our politician and civil servant more is not going to put a bigger dent in your wallet and pride.It is a continuing act of faith.

Faith in a government, in those at its helm and in those who carry out its work, to bring this country forward and to improve the well-being of Singaporeans. And we trust that the faith we place by acccepting the need for upward salary adjustments is not going to be misplaced.

And I somehow cant totally agree with video clip found against our highly criticized leader on this website.

http://www.sheepcitytv.com/

Enjoy...

Fear is your foe

When we're down, we turn to friends. But hearing solutions on individual perspectives has its downsides. How many time have you heard a friend saying "oh he..he's always like that, just ignore him" Ignorance is a bliss if the matter ignores you as well.

I've come across some good sources that has made me see much clearer picture and clear paradigms of problems as dead end but view it as challenges.

'One ought never to turn one's back on a threatened danger

and try to run away from it.

If you do that yuo will double the danger.

But if you meet it promptly and without flinching

you reduce the danger by half.

Never run away from anything!'

By Winston Churchill

I know that challenges are to brew in everyday.

I take them as a learning hole.

Fear says Run. Courage says Stop and Fight.

Let('s) go

I said let it go

Let us go.

It not Love and you still reiterate on it.

In my eyes you rather seem weak.

You give Lust a new name. Love.

You are trying to run but you hardly hide your weakness.

I feel pity of your esteem.

Though I kissed you, it means nothing when its dawn.

New day but same old miseries.

Had I Kissed someone

with a goodbye timebomb, again?

I cried thinking if I had a cursed love life.

Thinking if I've to battle it out all alone.

Praying for prayers to be answered.

hope i'm not living a cursed love life.

i can't play second fiddle.

i can't let you just taste the kisses and leaving me to misses

Occupational Hazard in my Job...

To Business Development Manager,

I am writing this letter with utmost apology regards to the damage done to company’s notebook. I believe that my reasons are valid and acceptable to seek leniency for the payment of notebook damages.

It was during a road show in Marine Parade, on 9th May'08, when the mishap took place. As the road show was conducted outdoors, the strong winds were uncontrollable and had caused things around the tent to fall off. While clearing the mess, it was then an unnoticed cup of sugared drink has spilled onto my notebook. It was truly beyond my control to prevent such a mishap timely.

I understand that equipments given to us by the company is our sheer responsibility to take good care of. However, in this situation it was truly an unfortunate thing to have happened.

I am more than willing to pay for the damages. But to pay a price as high as my one month basic salary for the above-mentioned event would really be de-motivating and highly stressful for me. I would like to seek some leniency and a discounted price to pay for the damages. Your understanding is much appreciated. I am available for face-to-face clarifications. Thank You.

Yours truly,
Nithya L Krishnan
Agency Code: M93 55088
Tel: 98435709.

cc. Maybank Partnerships Channel Head and Partnership Distribution Director.

A letter that halved my damages paid for my laptop.

When the mind gets over the body.

Soccer is one sport that has pushed me to the limits. I had faced insults, pain, disgrace, glory and joys and many more.

During the tournaments years back, the familiar heat was my biggest headache. Water bottles kissed me more than anything(one) else. Tiredness is hardly spoken of but felt throughout. Big Deuter bags that cling on to me through thick and thin. The bus would be filled up with light hearteds and laughters that never wondered about the upcoming challenges.

This time same scenario but different purpose. The game is played in the forest. Trekking up the 64th Highest Mountain in Malaysia, Gunung Ledang, Mount Ophir. Organised by a die-hard Liverpool Fan, Vengaji the leader and owner of Awakening Centre. Not to mention my passion for Arsenal, if not soccer bites could occur.

It was a memorable trip. An extraordinary for all bodied and minds. A retreat to nature has never been this much since my 2004 Chiang Mai Adventure.

Looks like I'm painting a beautiful picture here. Yes I am. I could only beautify it in my room because I'm safe back from the trip. But when in the jungle all, at 1000 feet above, I was thinking only of the staircase; The trail that leads back to the starting point.

Let me tell how it all began. There are heroes and heroines over here if not for blunders and mis judgements and of course Never Say Die Attitude.

First we headed first for the waterfalls. Got ourselves fun and wet and none changed as we get set for the climbing. It was almost NS alike. Mind you, this trip had 90% percent ladies.

The idea was to get set for 4 check points. But as soon as the 1st group (younger and well bodied), where I was in, got up to the 1st Checkpoint-CP1 the group of mothers were still trailing up. Understandable. Yet when they reached up, FINISHING the plan was on their mind. Salutes to them.

Now settled at Checkpoint 2 (CP2), 1000 odd feet above. The 1st group, yet again reached first and this was where the saga brewed. The team of 25 got disbanded to 3 separate groups. 1st group wanted to finish the trail. The other 2 were far behind. The guides' decision was all that we had to follow. They were inexperienced yet sounded promising. We were told that if we follow this new trail, we could reach the Elephant Pond and CP4 within an hour or so.

Now its passion above patience. Shall we wait or make a move first? We wanted to reach there so much ignoring the time. It was 4pm. Not a good idea because upon returning it would turn dark. Darkness while you’re thousand feet above ground? I leave it to your imagination.

The 1st group left CP2. Leaving behind the 2nd group waiting for the 3rd group. We felt like warriors. Tiredness was hardly felt. But as we kept moving, climbing upon fallen trees and kneeling below trunks gave us the first signal of fatigue. The time on the watch gave me the creep. Realising that returning would be a dark and dangerous adventure. I was afraid. I didn't have any torchlight so did all the other 7 hikers. I wished I had carried my TIGER EYE Bracelet. How could I ever forgot my favorite of all bracelets.

I told the co-organisar Thana, lets head back. Soon one of the 2 guides recieved a message that the 2 groups had discontinued the trekking. I wished this would support my plea. She didn't listen. She was my good friend, like an argument in any relationship, I raised my voice with displeasure. Mentioning it would be illogical and impractical if we continue. Turning back at darkness would be worthless. As usual, her strong faith within rejected me. "Why give up when we are almost there". I got enraged. This is a spiritual trip. I kept repeating 'No anger over the mind'. You think I was cool...Na??? I was honest to my emotions and couldn't control it.

Halfway through after 45 min, the team gave up. We didn't want to continue any further. Are we giving up or giving in to safety measure? We gave up... Thana listened. Her actions really irritated me as she preferred to listen to others than to me. I expected this from her. Somehow it seems slightly revengeful as she didn’t wish to listen to me since the beginning.

As we head back, unfamiliarity travelling in the darkness gave me the creep. The other 7 trekkers were cool, and kept going. I was telling, thing are getting ok. Just move on. No point getting frustrated as its disrespectful. The trail to CP2 seemed never ending . In the darkness there were only two torchlights and a long trail. The speed had to slow down. On the contra I found it to be thrilling. I started enjoying the pain.

It took an hour to get back to CP2. The remaining gangs were waiting for us all these while for solid 90 min. Thanks to them. We had huge relief when we saw them.

Soon we started trailing back. Many strong minded were seen at this time. Vengaji, carrying his son for the past 3 hours. His wife June supporting and ensuring all is fine and well in the darkness. Komala's shoes rubbered heels came off leaving her less supported feet to feel the rocky path throughout. Nava aunty had troubling knees and age to deal with. 2 guides carried her till the end of the trekking. Salute to those guides. Not failing to mention thirsty hikers, blistered feet, aching bodies and many more...

At the end of the trail, I had learnt many other things...Leaving us with memories and smiles within.

and We Never Walked Alone as Members of the Awakening Centre.

I sell something that

i sell something that is highly needed by the less priveleged, needy and low incomed. but i prefer to sell it to the able ones cos they promise the contract.

i sell promises that can't and would never be promised to be delivered by me but only by my principal.

i sell something that is unsought. and i know that only emotions are the way to go.

i sell expensive 'tissue papers' that protect you in mishaps.

and i don't sell that by singing songs or walking to tables. but i'm given a deejay to sing songs and give the talk. and i have tables set at my territory.

i sell 1st prize tickets where the owner don't enjoy but only his beneficiaries upon his death.

I sell insurance for the listeners and protection for the loving ones...

I love my job that allows me to see who i am really... do u? Love yours I mean?

coiled pleasure

its a relaxin and mind blowing day.

all i need next is a good weekend break. lookinng ffffooooorwardddddd.

just love malaysia.

Tongue Lashers.

I wish you to know what is on my head.

1. I'm not rich. If I were to be, I'll be shaking leg at home.
2. I'm not uptight but I just have this stern face as you're really amusing me.
3. I've nothing to say for you. So pls just shut up boasting.
4. I'm sleepy cos you're boring.
5. I bitch about you to my friends and cash on you when you're unaware of it.
6. I'm sorry if you mistaken my prompt response to be some sort of interest towards you. Its just that i've free incoming calls and 500 sms free and my co pays my phone bills.
7. I've seen too many dramas like yours thus I don't wish to hear your stories.
8. If you're a special one, I'll be full of heartfelt compliments.
9. If I can't stand you, you probably know it and somehow you'll try your best to alter my impressions.
10. J. Murugash < none of this but 8 is for you>
11. I think you're deprived cos you keep talking about sex
12. You'll probably been with dokes cos you seem to think all girls are meant for kinky fun.
13. If I'm busy for you, probably you've to try your best to come up with good reasons to meet me.
14. If you see me boasting probably I'm trying to get you to a challenge.
15. You have been telling me your taste of kind of girls at every instance cos you have (most likely) known that babes will not look at you.
16. You have been toying or been toyed by girls and now you have given up and plan to keep a domestic goddess to play God in your defeated love world.
17. You give up relationship cos you know that none will fall for the low self esteem you.

Go On...

Dedicate my lines back to me...

only to realise its been lil too late...

leavin u to only dream of...

saying something stupid like I love you

she draws a heavy sigh looking at the mirror.
the stoic glass of red wine is left half filled on the dressing table.

she looks at the wrinkle cream, guessing its content left.
looks at the improvement of her wrinkle on her eyes.
bereaves at the impact of aging.

she knows that her man is losing interest.
he can't recognise her to be the woman of her dreams.
though his wedding band is the only witness to that dreams of his.

yet he comes over and kisses her cheek.
encouraging every line on her face is a glory path for their love.
never once to give up on his love.
and wishes her happy annivesary...

and i wish that would be a perfect upcoming scene in my life one day some day...

I know I stand in line, until you think you have the time

To spend an evening with me

And if we go someplace to dance,

I know that theres a chance

You wont be leaving with me

And afterwards we drop into a quiet little place

And have a drink or two

And then I go and spoil it all,

by saying something stupid

Like: I love you

I can see it in your eyes, that you despise the same old lies

You heard the night before

And though its just a line to you, for me its true

It never seemed so right before

I practice every day to find some clever lines to say

To make the meaning come through

But then I think Ill wait until the evening gets late

And Im alone with you

The time is right your perfume fills my head, the stars get red

And oh the nights so blue

And then I go and spoil it all,

by saying something stupid

Like: I love you(I love you, I love you,...)

sang by an amateur for an actress...

Tears

I could hardly cry. Not even handle the truth.
Only to choke on myself. I wish to cry over something I've lost. But have I ever found it to lose it?

I wonder who instilled that thought "keep going".
It makes me to go without looking back.

I can't have the power to say I love You. Neither do I have the strength to anticipate the response.

I wish to hold your lips to mine. Yet I know it will never be mine.
Tears could solve the problem. But it reminds me as an act of cowardice.

I wonder what is the true self me. Will you be sent down to reflect on me.

Ohm Shukraya Namaha

Can I go for what I want?
Or would you label me arrogant?
Or find me confident?

I just want the man of my dreams to come to me and say...
You are the one... I've lost and found.

Lost and missed

Ever missed anything in life tremendously that it brings u near to tears.
Sometimes food really does wonders. If you know that the way to a man's heart is through his stomach, No You are not aiming any high but that is the spot....

Well thats a cliche. You can almost see it in movies.
The fish curry scene is one. Whereby our well known gaffer Sivaji Ganesan's acting in Mudhal Mariyaathai. Caught it on TV last week and yes that is a Classic Gold scene. Upon compelled to try the dish, he was brought to tears with ease.

And what about the movie Ratatouille. The signature dish brought the sterned upper lipped critic to reel back in memories. To his good ol' mom cooking. And then instant accreditions to the chef.

I too miss something like that. My grandmothers fish bone pepper soup. The unillustratable ingredients well blended to give me the kick. Till date none has cooked or even created it.

And also her love and attention I get without fail on Sunday mornings. At the market, there I'll heap on mangoes, chocs and chocs. Well even then aphrosidiac is on my mind always.

Lost her to Someone G(o)od and still miss(ing) her gifted moments and savours.

And many many others that I'll miss... and had lost...
Perhaps I can make up for it with the one I love.

HappY Mother's Day

There was a boy in town. Or it seems he's hardly in town. Due to money making process and regulating orders on the 22man field.

Looks like he has a tough date to match. His hitch to someone who would be well domesticated to his absence and mother's needs i guess.

There was a gal always in town. It seems she's always in town trying to be the talk of it. She feels that she's too settled and wants to get settled cos she deserves it.

She met the regulator for business deals. To smoothen his money making process. But the regulator showed in actions he is not keen on it but on the dealor(she). She realised he's full of fake and his smile was the best Hyena smile she ever seen.

And recollection of unpleasant DeJaVu experiences reeled in. She has no need to keep her cool.

She Lost Her Self

Message to nobody.

Pointer.

If you know what you want. Feel firm
If you know what you want and want to get it. Feel strong
If you know what you want and you know that you will end up in hot spot. Fuck yourself.
Don't harp on it.

Perhaps acting too smart isn't impressive.

Why complain

Oh guys..
why complain?
move on with a new solution
why gossip?
get going with your pending job

After all politics, gossips, bitching is not going to get you anywhere.
Whats the point?

You will still be tapping the "peep" ezlink card in the mercedes bus and your boss will be driving home in his convertible. So no point kicking a fuss.

Recuperating

I'm recuperating. there are so many things happening.
Healing myself from my wasted early twenties. now that i've gotten a good job, all i need is to just adjust and enjoy the days to come. But the most i need for now is just some time and strong health.

have been falling sick for quite some time. thats not so me. i hate queues in clinics. luckily the bills are being footed by my co. Hospital expenses are really on its sky rocket heights nowadays. the pain on my back which was thought to be some kidney disorder isn't really anything linked to that. only will get to know through other tests on the month of April. Its been annoying when i've been on a 'fire' and this pain comes out of nowhere. prayers have been on my mind on most days.

bala~n~cing

Today is Good Friday. I'm not supposed to work. But I did. With the leisure of my laptop, obviously on my lap, and negotiating on the phone with a balding million dollar owner of a landed property. As I was explaining him how this insurance could save his family free from debts should he die. I meant his house and its loan tenure. I felt like a cool professional you would see on TV. A cool lad(y) sipping coffee and on the phone negotiotes with an hard to miss prospect.

And definitely there is more to life to come. As I was looking through his loan documents, (nothing P&C as I've not mentioned his name) he earns $17,000 a month and some Director of a Banking Institute. How would I wish that I could be one of the man like this. Wishfully, before I turn 40.

Is money really that hard to be earned? Obviously not. Its the unpredictable consequences I guess. Few days ago I attended a meditation seminar. I was told by my trainer a story.

'' In this world there are three type of men. You suit yourself accordingly. In a bottom of a River waterfall there were 3 men. They are situated against the current. 1 men bravely decides to swim against the current and land upstream. An impossible feat but that possible. He achieves to the north stream but is panting, tired, sick and asks the last question-- Why am I here for?

The second man has the mantra GO WITH THE FLOW. Decides to flow with the currents and not argue or defy the nature. He is obviously ambitionless

The 3rd man- is the one who goes with flow and sits like a backpacker and absorbing the energy by resting whever possible. Hard to achieve but thats the challenge of life. Balancing your life at every opportunity."

I know that my line of work is not easy. As told by everyone let it be verbally, signallings or even by resigning. Its my challenge to upheld. The money is there. For those who masters the art of balancing.

Signing of by a Libran

Rumors

Politics. Rumors.Grapevines.Sourgrapes.Anti-Click.Dishonesty.Sham.Bad Egg.

You name it. But office politics are sure to brew.

More coming up. Akan Datang.

Fireworks..

Question: How do we describe the fireworks?
Ans: Thrilling magical surprising noisy.

Really? I was thinking all this while - Fireworks are a show of 'money spent seeking greed burnt in matters of moment.' Speaking of striking lucky. How about catching the Thrill of your dream $$$$ striking in the air at least.

Totalisator---> cant they divulge their earnings?

Save HIM

As days went by, months followed, & a year follows soon after. On a special occasian of the year we'll be flooded with well-wishing texts msgs, reminding us of our age. I was pretty immune to the age reminder till late. But sadly nowadays when my parents or myslf recieve these sandalwood bordered envelopes(weddin invitations), I cant help but this nasty age factor creeps into ma head. All these courtesy to my mom. & also some to my cousins who're planning to get married. 1 of em is abt to get engaged & the other R.O.M. Well thats so soon but gd for them. I dunno which part of me fooled my mom to think I've got a steady boyfren (its Poor mom, NOT ME), she would all of a sudden mention I shul leave the hse & start my own...(ITs poor ME this time)

AaRgh! Well she did mention with care & concern... LoL! In a funny cracker mood, I told myslf that I think i shul have some concerns for the man i get hitched to..The following were some of the reasons I came up with thinkin me getting married might close his life!!!

1st, the Hospital I was born, its no longer here...Toa Payoh hospital, heard of it any1?

2nd, the Kindergarden, in HENDERSON that I frolicked to...Gone to dust, to make way for new housings.
3rd, Primary school...its JAgoH Primary ( NOT CORN eh) Now all empty & I can clearly see this Golf Course behind it. FINALLY!!!

4th, St Teresa's High. Though the Reverend Tang swindle money from the St Teresa Church, apparently he couldn't swipe anythin from this school. Cos the school was barely self-sufficient & had to be closed down before he could try his luck! Or maybe he was the reason for its closure... Hmph ...hmph...

5th, After St Teresa, I went to the most Dreaded St Thomas...sorry folks(BUT i vowed in Pri sch that I'll neva go thr, but i Did). Hmm The Ulu greyed sch was too deserted....ITs out & away...its no more too

6th, MY jinx got a bit better. The Building & Real Estate Diploma i took, changed to Real EState Business on the year I left.Phew! See! Its not a full closure, but the "building" got "renovated" to BUSINESS

7th, the first football team I went, Tampines Rovers 1951, disbanded due to "old" age. When the management made the news known to players, he announced on my birthday. Aargh!

GOD is Smart & GREAT isnt he...Luckily I wasnt Born A MALE...IMAGINE The plight of Singapore IF I'd SErvEd NATIONAL SERVICE...
Hey Momsie, Even though no ppl were "closed" in my sad story, what if some twists & curls take place? This time it could be my "Poor Partner". Do I SOUND LIKE SUMIKO TAN& her excuses in the Sunday times?

Damaged insides.

Cant digest the sight of those smoking fags after fags. It seems sickening when the white thing just keeps burning and puffed out. You look dirty and sick.

Women smoking, ladies smoke , girls smoked and men smoke always. A habit that no longer run through dudes. Adding to today's stress we too just run down with fags whenever feel like running away from stress.

Even after seeing the run ins of "smoking kills" nothing stops us. The horror pictures are looking nothing close to Saw movie trailer. And the government are becoming creative with more and more grisly images through the run offs with our money. No thanks do gravity defying taxes.

Heard the latest news running around my neighbourhood? Ran away Indonesians are selling illegal cigarettes in the Dairy Farm Expressway. Police are sure to run after them. Hey ran-away fellows, you can't run away from the "PETIR". Its illegal to run with government potential taxes. After all you know why and I shall not explain anymore.

I'm becoming sick and don't understand what is happening of my body. What ran off in white puffs could have its contradicing color on my lungs. Devestating running off of useless imagination but its the fact.

Decided to run for good. To start off, planned and took action by jogging. But hey its not only my lungs that needs treatment to run with. Its my belly too. Having a 'good' life with six packs and its damaging on my packed abs. Beer runs into Beer Belly . They named it as part of entertainment and I call it job hazards. I had 8 parties in my 2 months of work. And in all these parties beers tempted me more than the cigarettes.

Heard enough? Now let me run you with a complete round up.
I still cant stand the sight of one smoking. Don't show me different runs of cigarettes please. Though I smoke, please, don't you light up the fag and blow it in front of me. I run into imaginations and feel how sickly you can be.

Those who don't smoke. Please tell me how you control it and don't feel tempted to smoke?

NTY- lost innocence to deadly curiousity.

Venus Glory

It is appropriate writing about her on a Friday.
Venus's Day...

My hurrah and hymn for my beloved Planet Venus
She looks female, but resides only in male. Isn't shim?

Bub RocKs
Babe sees PoPs

'White' the color
Pleasures trifold in feller

And Pleasures sail in the Yemaya*
Cry in/and Joy bestow the other side of Ocean
And the nature is on a promotion
I call it Overpopulation

*Yemaya- Goddess of Ocean


For those who decipher the hymn above, (shall not call it poem).
Don't say yikes. I've warned you before,so did my host Google.

Carpe Diem

Livealikes

Wait. Would the internet police get on standby if I were to post some biased statements?

How about getting a prize for guessing how celebrities impose their exacting personality based on their moon sign?

Perhaps not both If I disclose the personalities of whom I have gotten intriqued by because we have something identical? (Or I hope)

Well here it goes...
Scorpio Moon- Fear being Vulnerable, secretive, mysterious, brooding, alluring, moody, manipulative, pain triggering, controlling emotions and cold.

Emotionally guarded. Strong emotions and passions- sometimes overwhelming. Hard to share deepest secrets and most intense emotion. Conflicting secrecy and revelation are constantly . Fascinated by fire, the passion, the dirty and forbidden.

Sharon Stone

Saddam Hussein

Scarlett Johanssen

Lee Kuan Yew

Libran Sun and Scorpio Moon

Will Smith

Lifepath No.4 and with an Attitude that makes u indecisive whether to Love or Hate

Lee Kuan Yew

Vidya Balan-


Loved by Hitched ones

Lena Headey Aspired to be a journalist but is now happy being someone else and has Bengali blood too!

Sushmita Sen
Great Heart Bad Karma

Karna

Lone Ranger

Tintin

The Holiday

Few weeks ago I was out with a guy for an Italian dinnner. I could still recall our topic that came out of nowhere. He mentioned working in F&B line many years ago. And said (impressed) how he would be stashed with tips amounting as much as to couple of hundreds to a K.

Strange, strong reminiscience fell in without invitation. Paused my meal. Was engaged with some deep thoughts. (Its not a wonder of me doing it, isn't it) Hey... I got the best tip ever in my life. The best tip and treat that none other could compete and excite each other. An opportunity to see the west & best end of the EU continent by someone who patron the Italian Restaurant I worked for.

My Lone Best Pre-Marital Honeymoon ever. The best partner I could roam with in any Amazing G/Race gameshow. The best spots I would die to visit. The Best Moments I would live for.
Love you always G.

The kind I like...

Well I'm trying to confirm my ideal lover package. I realised I've trouble letting people know what kinda person I am. It has never been this easy to let it out in words. Here I am, just communicating my ideals and likes of myself and the better half or anyone out there regardless of any relations.

No. I'm not a flirtatious sort. Instead, my appeal lies in my dedication, my willingness to work on the relationship, and to make the relationship work in real terms. Don't expect me trying to impress you with grand gifts or promises. I'm less showy, but perhaps far more generous -- gifts of devotion and attention to details about you.

I rather quietly make my way to your heart. If you don't know I'm quite sensitive in love -- even insecure -- and this reserved, loner-like quality has been my appeal. You better know that I'm ignorant to a degree as I have the need to be confident that you like me before I make a move.

For I'm a great listener and I do make it a habit to observe and learn all of your ins and outs. I'm sorry if my love can be of the Kindergarten variety -- Unfortunately I show that I care by nagging or criticizing. Remember, though, that I'm not trying to hurt you when I'm pointing out the flaws in your thinking, plans, or even character. I'm truly trying to help!Somehow I'm attracted to nondescript people who have largely gone unnoticed. Show-offs and know-it-alls turn me off.

Pleasing me involves you showing appreciation for all the little things you do -- and I too do a lot. The problem is, I do these things so quietly that you may not always notice or credit them for all these kind gestures. I always do need some space (after all, I've generally quite busy making everything work), so give it to me.

Be genuine, not ostentatious. I'm not really that to please after you have taken care of these basic needs. I aim to please, and is easily intimidated by your experiences. Let me know how much you value me, and I will reward you with devotion and a charming willingness to talk things out.

My Personal Ad Bio: "I will care for you, and do lots of little things for you even being nosy at times. I will help you. Be willing and strong like a Diamond to be sculpted."

Venus...Please Rule Me

She is a seducer ; Aphrodite

She, Mother of Eros, whose power seduces many men and set their fleet on fire; Sita and Helen of Troy

The lady of fortune where many powerful men would flinch without her presence; Goddess Lakshmi for Narayanaa.

Whose innocent sparkle gives others the impression as easy yet hard to penetrate; Diamond.

Her color that is so pure and clear where many toils to keep it crystal; White

It wasn't a coincidental act why I yearned so much for my diamond nose stud or

How much I love my White sari and those pearl white necklaces..

I wonder why I am so fascinated by the Goddess of Love- Venus. But I wish her to rule me throughout my Life. Diamonds are Truly Forever...

She is the one who lets us reveal our emotions and feelings. Never deny her. Or else all turns detrimental.

Utmost Giver of pleasures through the pains.

The queen of Love and Hearts with Hurts(complimentary).

The gal who loves her diamond nose stud.

Keep DreaminG... and You'll be right there seeing her. Like I did in Louvre, Paris 2007.

Crazy Solitude equals to Success

How many times have you wondered why some achievers aren't that amiable.
Because they have achieved pinnacles, Loads of wealth and a need to Show off?

None I feel. Reason is that They have achieved the thoughts that you have rejected. Isn't it true that what we admire in the life of others is often our own rejected thoughts?

Unlike others they need to stay away from the commoners. And these commoners are not seen as piece of crap but rather too simple for their own ideals. So different that they feel repelled on their own.

Move away commoners. Perhaps I'm becoming too aggressive for your own good...